School Is Heartbreaking
I’m going to be really raw with you guys about something… elementary school is breaking my heart.
You see, I have one son who is incredibly gifted. Young Jedi is in third grade. He is smart. He is articulate. School is almost too easy for him.
My little Ninja (fourth grade) on the other hand – is struggling. He has ADD. He has an IEP. He has a problem with his executive functioning. But he is an amazingly pure and sweet little soul with the best of intentions.
He tries so hard to comprehend what comes so easy to other children. We’ve had him in reading clinics for years. He has had tutors. Right now he is even in an after school program for math.
He tries so damn hard.
Last night he ended up curled up under my kitchen table crying his little eyes out because he just COULDN’T UNDERSTAND. It was the most heartbreaking thing I have ever seen. In fact, I am crying right now just remembering it.
My heart just aches for him.
All I could do was scoop him up into my lap and rock him back and fourth.
School just sucks sometimes.
Twitter: dipaolamomma
says:
Hey is such a wonderful guy. Even my tiny little 3 year old could see that. She asks for him all the time. I think it’s one of the hardest things we do as a parent, to sit there and see their pain and not be able to just whisk it away. I know you know this, but his having these problems in no way impedes is ability to be great.. and I just KNOW he will be. That said I think I’ll go hug my kids now.. and tell him from me, Math makes me cry too!
DiPaola Momma´s last blog ..The Greatest Casualty is to Be Forgotten
JennieG
Twitter: mammamania
Reply:
November 12th, 2009 at 10:30 PM
Thanks Lara… yes, math always made me cry. And now, it haunts me again!
I’m so sorry you’re going through that with him. It would break my heart too not to be able to help more. Best wishes to you all on this.. I hope it gets easier for him.
JennieG
Twitter: mammamania
Reply:
November 12th, 2009 at 10:30 PM
Thanks Mary. I am hoping it will get easier!
Oh Jen, I’m sorry you..and he..have to go through that. It can be so difficult…having a wonderful mama like you to rock away those tears WILL make all the difference in his life.
JennieG
Twitter: mammamania
Reply:
November 12th, 2009 at 10:31 PM
Sometimes kisses make it all better. I might not be able to solve his school issues but I can make him smile!
Well my experience with this growing up with cousins and siblings with ADD and all sorts of other diagnosis’ from our wonderful medical society is to find something that he is good at and promote that 100%. School is full of pressure and teachers who are not trained to deal with anything out of the ordinary so try not to let them influence you. My cousin started swimming in a swim team when he was in third grade. The school system told my Aunt he would never graduate from HS but actually he went on to college with a swimming scholarship.
JennieG
Twitter: mammamania
Reply:
November 12th, 2009 at 10:32 PM
See, that is terrific to hear!!! My hope is that one day we will laugh about his 4th grade math issues … as he is graduating law school!
Jennie, I have two polar opposites as well. Kooper and Kamden are both ADD. Well, Koop is ADD, Kamden is ADHD. Kooper had an IEP and an AIP(academic improvement plan) until 3rd grade. We turned a corner with reading once we got him interested in comic books and graphic novels. But we also had to really work with his pediatrician to come up with a dosage and medication that worked for him. We changed several times. He has taken Adderal, Concerta, Vyvanse, had Stratera additionally, patches. You name it we have tried it. Kamden on the flip side is gifted and has a customized program put together by his gifted teacher and regular teacher to keep him occupied in class so he doesn’t disturb the other children when he gets bored. Please feel free to email me if you need some advice or just someone to chat with about it. I know where you are coming from!! *hug* Love!
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That makes me so sad!
Michelle´s last blog ..♥Rough Stuff.
Jen- I can so relate to your situation. Nothing hurts worse than seeing your child hurt and not being able to fix it. I have two with ADD/ADHD, IEP, etc. They don’t all start out on an even playing field and schools is so scary and hard for some and too easy for others. Find something he excels at and make the biggest *(%$&^ deal of it, even if it’s a little unorthodox. Mine climbs. He’s not only ADD, he’s had bi-lateral club foot surgery, so he’s not the most athletic, but he can climb a rope, pole, tree, lamp post better than any other kid and I LET HIM and stand at the bottom and clap! Positive thoughts coming your way!
JennieG
Twitter: mammamania
Reply:
November 13th, 2009 at 8:46 PM
Oh, wow Marquita – we can so relate to each other! Thanks for the suggestion… I will definitely do it. He is a doll baby and it kills me when I see his frustration. I am sure you understand. Mind if I email you? I think you could teach me a thing or two!
I feel for you and have deep empathy. My youngest is in 9th Grade, he’s had an IEP since Kindergarten. I know exactly where you are coming from. It is VERY, VERY hard as a parent to see our children struggle in school- and we struggle when we try to help them but just don’t have the answers. It’s a journey- and I can honestly say that I cannot wait for my son to graduate from high school. KUDOS to you for being a supportive Mom!
Sara Broers´s last blog ..Ways this Iowa family is going GREEN!
Twitter: brennbug
says:
So sorry to hear and he probably feels like he also can’t do as well as his younger brother which has to be hard.
School is too easy for my three kids but keeping them engaged and motivated is my challenge.
Michelle´s last blog ..I now have TWO nine year olds, Yikes!