I Just Realized That I Will Never Get To Sleep Again
“I’ll sleep when I am dead!”
Yeah. I always hated that phrase. When I was a kid, I used to think it was a declaration in stupidity. Cause, really, sleep is lovely. Sleeping in a comfy bed with a down comforter wrapped around you is the ultimate happy place.
Now that I am a mom, I understand that phrase perfectly because that is what my life has morphed into. I never sleep anymore.
It is all because I had children.
I put them to bed at 8:15pm. At 9:42pm they were are still awake.
Fully, awake.
Like, asking questions awake.
Like, wanting a snack awake.
They never sleep.
I would like to know…. No, let me rephrase that… What I DEMAND to know is when I can actually sleep again? I thought that surely by now my children would be snoozing regularly. Bed at 8:00pm. Waking at 7:00am.
And me… I had visions of my husband and I sleeping soundly through the night. Quiet, uninterrupted, slumber. Zzzzz……
I’m gonna be honest with you. THAT has NEVER happened. They still wake me up.
It is a rare occasion, indeed, when my children don’t wake up in the middle of the night yelling for me or my husband. On those rare occasions they haven’t woke up, they sleep-talk. Which is kinda like sleep walking except it is out loud. Usually it consists of important random tidbits (screamed at the top of their lungs) like, “I SAID IT IS A CIRCLE!” or “MY CRAYON SMELLS LIKE TOAST!”
And of course, we hear them yelling and we go tearing down the hallway to investigate…
You know, nobody warns you about this. Basically you are told that once you get your “babies” to sleep through the night, everything else is golden.
Don’t buy it, folks. If you are pregnant or have small children, you had better just come to terms with it now. You won’t be sleeping through the night again until they are away at college. Actually, now that I am thinking it, THAT is not even true. I’m definitely sure I will loose sleep when they are at college. HOLY CRAP. 
Then that means, NO SLEEPING AGAIN… EVER! I am just realizing this.
Dr. Spock has no idea what he is talking about.
Dr. Spock is sleeping now
This is very true. It took me five years after the last one graduated High School to learn to not do mornings again.
Now it’s the grandkids waking me up in the middle of the night…… When they stay with us…….
Funny you wrote about this today ’cause I was just busy complaining on Twitter about how every single one of the humans I live with woke me up for some reason last night (or this morning, but as it was pitch dark I consider it night still). The only ones in this house willing to let me rest are the fish. So, yeah, I’m kinda wishing I was sleeping with the fishes. That actually doesn’t sound so horrible at the moment.
I swear I’m just going to start each comment to your posts with “No doubt!”.
I’ll post about it today but the lack of sleep I’ve had due to snoring (fully pain-medicated up) hubbie and walking/talking/yelling sleeping boys have been my nightmare this past week. Oy!
Let’s not forget our 15 year old dog, who wakes us up in the middle of the night to go out. I say weekend sleepover at Mom Mom’s house so we can get some sleep.
[...] Just about the time I think I’m alone in a parenty/mothery/wifey issue, all I have to do is read another blog or catch up on Twitter to find that EVERY mother on earth is feeling the EXACT same way. [...]
I don’t want to rub it in but my kids sleep well and have for awhile. The first 3 years were rough but now they even come downstairs and make themselves a bowl of cereal. Hubby and I have a main floor master and the three kids all have rooms and one full bath upstairs. It truly is heavenly!