I May End Up Perishing In A Vat Of Lava. Just Sayin’
I feel like my children are obsessed with me dying. Actually, scratch that. I feel like my children are obsessed with the the way in which I want to die. Or maybe they are just curious? Or maybe they need psychological help? Or maybe they are plotting something?
It seems like every time I turn around they are asking me bizarre random questions about my untimely demise. It usually goes something like this:
BOYS: So, mom. Would you rather die from a shark attack at sea, be thrown into a vat of lava or fall into a pit of snakes?
ME: Err…. none?
BOYS: C’mon, mom. You have to choose something!
ME: Okay, then. I guess lava because it is quicker.
BOYS: Would you rather be eaten by a dinosaur or killed by a Jedi lightsabor?
ME: I don’t know. Why?
BOYS: JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION, MOM!
ME: Dinosaur.
BOYS: How about a million killer bee stings? Or a giant wall of fire?
ME: Oh for heaven’s sake!
BOYS: What?
This kind of thing happens all the time. They think up the most ridiculous situations and give me a preference between the two. Which makes me wonder…. Are they plotting against me? Am I in danger, here?
The next time I say no to iCarly on a school night should I look over my shoulder for a dinosaur or a swarm of killer bees?
Or is it all some kind of pre-pubescent male mommy mind trick?
Call me crazy but I am beginning to feel like perhaps we should seek family counseling.
Oh my goodness! What imaginations they have!!
Death by Jedi lightsaber might be interesting…
.-= Mandi´s last blog ..On Getting (Relatively) Older =-.
JennieG
Twitter: mammamania
Reply:
January 12th, 2010 at 11:08 AM
Oh you have no idea! LOL!
Too funny! It’s boys I tell ya.
JennieG
Twitter: mammamania
Reply:
January 12th, 2010 at 12:31 PM
If you say so. I’ll believe you… the alternative is that they are budding serial killers. Which would be a parenting fail, I think.
Twitter: domestksuprhero
says:
Goodness. I think I might think twice about throwing out a “no” or the dreaded “let’s see” too!
However, I do agree that the lava pit would be pretty instantaneous. I’m all for quick and easy.
.-= Sunday Stilwell´s last blog ..Post It Note Tuesday: The Blockhead Edition =-.
JennieG
Twitter: mammamania
Reply:
January 12th, 2010 at 2:17 PM
Yeah, totally. The lava is efficient. So it is decided, then…. death by lava. One less thing I have to worry about in life.
Just boys being boys, unfortunately
.-= Melissa Multitasking Mama´s last blog ..Green glasses? Who knew… =-.
Twitter: dishes_laundry
says:
Boys are so silly!
.-= Michelle´s last blog ..Simply Love Swap =-.
Boys are so awesome. I totally pick death by lightsaber!
.-= Adrienzgirl´s last blog ..Post-It Note Tuesday: Best Video Evah =-.
Twitter: mammamania
says:
Brandee – really? Death by lightsabor huh? I would prefer death by sleep but I was never given that option. They are so out to get me.
Twitter: Pixielation
says:
My girls don’t speculate on the manner of my death, but they do play games in which they are ophans.
.-= pixielation´s last blog ..Aerobics on acid =-.
At least is wasn’t stung by a million bees then have parts sliced off by lightsaber (which would cauterize the wound do you don’t bleed to death) finally having your barely alive body tossed into a pit of lava