Why I Should Be Quarantined Until April 4th
This is an official warning. Stay away from me until April 4th. I might need to be quarantined. I am DANGEROUS to be around.
Why? (Ahem) I gave up BREAD for Lent.
I have no idea why. Well, obviously I have an IDEA why but I still don’t know why I chose bread. Did I mention that I also gave up DESSERT?
I. AM. AN. IDIOT.
I know, okay. I KNOW! But it sounded good at the time. I was all proud of myself for my “sacrifice.” I knew that by giving up those two things that I would really feel the impact of my decision. That I would really feel good about avoiding those two very common dietary staples in the name of the Lenten season. (Think what you want veggie eaters. They are BOTH staples in my house.)
I. AM. AN. IDIOT.
A mere two days into it I ordered a hummus bagel for lunch. Only after it was served did I realize that bagels are bread. DUH! So I scraped off the hummus, tomato and onion, threw away the bagel and fumed at my lack of an IQ while I licked the plate.
You wanna know what else this Mensa member gave up? YELLING. Oh, yeah. You read right. YELLING.
Now I can’t even YELL about what an IDIOT I am for giving up bread and dessert.
One more time – I. AM. AN. IDIOT.
On the other hand, maybe not.
You see, one thing I did NOT GIVE UP is wine. Have you figured out where I am going with this? Hey, don’t judge. Jesus turned water into wine. Remember?
So although I may be a crabby, bread and sugar deprived crazy woman, at least I will be too drunk to remember it!
Oh Jennifer, you know I still love you right??
Sniff, sniff! At least someone does!
I would die without bread. I feel so bad for you!!
=-.
.-= Michelle´s last blog ..♥I love contests!
I would think bread is easier to give up than chocolate. Or does dessert fall into the category too? I mean if i you just have it any time, is it really dessert? Good luck either way.
lol… I think bread’s probably easier to give up than, say, Twitter. But if you give up bread, what carbs are going to be your running fuel? You’ll need to compensate with lots of pasta.
.-= Michael´s last blog ..dadsthecook: The little one’s on the couch with a dog and a fever. Time for dad’s chicken soup and chamomile tea with honey, I believe. =-.
I applaud your sacrifice. I’ll bake you a loaf of fresh bread for April 5 as a reward
BTW, good move on not giving up wine.
.-= Beth Schillaci´s last blog ..My Zen – Flour, Sugar and Butter =-.
I love bread! The sacrifice is good for you right?
So, in other words, I should stay out of Panera Bread on April 5 since the place will be sold out?
Enjoy your wine!
.-= Michele´s last blog ..Just Because the Computer is There… =-.
I actually would choose BREAD over any sweets or desserts any day! My favorite thing ever. God Bless you dear. If you are able to do this, you will be my hero!
I feel your pain! I gave up bread over 3 years ago after learning I probably had a wheat allergy. I was an absolute BREAD-aholic!! I’ll be sure to say some prayer to help you through your sacrifice:-) And prayers for those that have to live with you lol!
Oh my goodness. Now you are gulp! bread free?
I know! Bread and cheese are my favs!
Exactly!!
If you actually bake me bread on April 5th then I will proclaim you queen of the world. For realz.