Every week I do a column for Want2Dish.com called Tweet Nothings.
This week’s focus gets my vote for mother-of-the-year 2012…

This story is so absurd that I almost didn’t believe it.

Seven-year-old Poppy Burge of England got a truly unique present from her mother this Christmas… a $11,000 voucher for liposuction.

I wish I were lying.

But I’m not.

The mother-of-the-year in question is Sarah Burge,51, a plastic surgery addict and self-proclaimed “Human Barbie.”  This isn’t the first time Burge has given her daughter such a unique gift. Oh no. The 7-year-old already has a credit on her account for breast enhancement surgery.

Because that is what every second grader needs, of course.

Click here to read the rest of the story. (Oh yes, it gets better.)