I’m so guilty of this.

Guilty of talking, talking, talking through my problems instead of going to God with them.

I have a habit of thinking that I am not important enough for him to focus on.

So I try to conquer my issues alone.

And I fail.

What a great reminder…

Image via ISharePrintables.com

I firmly believe that each of us was created for a purpose. What that purpose is, only God knows.

I’ve struggled with discovering my own purpose for years. Well, maybe the word “struggled” isn’t exactly correct. Perhaps searched is a better term. It is such a difficult thing to determine and frankly, I’m not sure if one is ever truly enlightened as to the impact they make on the world. At least, not while they are IN this world, anyway.

One of my goals for last year was to adopt a “mantra.” And by mantra I simply meant, a clear, guiding principal for life.

I didn’t find the perfect phrase until late November. I stumbled across it quite by accident while in line at the grocery store. It struck me as so profound and so simple that I had to immediately write it down lest I forget it. (Because I forget pretty much everything if I don’t record it.)

“I shall pass through this world but once. Any good, therefore, that I can show to any human being, let me do it now. Let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”~~Stephen Grellet

Quite simple and to the point.

Be good to everyone, all the time. Pretty powerful, wouldn’t you say?

“When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hang on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is
just the place and time that the tide will turn. “

~ Harriet Beecher Stowe

I distinctly remember walking down the street that night feeling utter despair.

I couldn’t even bring myself to cry.

I had no one to turn to and no friends left. The memory of the loneliest night of my life and the emptiness that I felt still haunts me.

You see, I had been passionately in love (read: obsessed) with a man for five years. I had molded my entire life around him. His interests, his passions… his friends. I altered my appearance to keep his attention. (He had a thing for uber-skinny red heads.) I even attending the same college so that we could be close together. I wanted nothing more than to be his everything. To tame the “bad boy” like some sort of sappy heroine in a romance novel.

I completely lost my identity.

When I found out that he had been with other women throughout our entire relationship, I was devastated.

I suddenly realized that without him, I had no idea who I was. I had been a character in his play for so long that I lost sight of my true self. When our relationship ended I found myself friendless. Most of the people I had been surrounded with knew about his actions and I was not the least bit interested in keeping them in my life.

I was in so much pain and truly uncertain of myself without him. My future looked bleak.

Except that it wasn’t. I just didn’t know it at the time. A scant eight months later I was living in another state with the man that would become my husband.

Many people let their feelings of despair consume their lives and rob them of the joy that is rightfully theirs. I could have succumbed to my emotions. I could have let it consume me  and missed out on the opportunity for a new beautiful relationship with my future husband.

But I didn’t.

I held on (we’re talking white knuckle grip here people) and had faith and trusted in God’s plan for my life.

Ready for a little unsolicited advice? If you are in a dark place and feel as if you will never emerge, set your sights on the future and trust in Him. There may seem like NO WAY OUT. You may not see a light at the end of the tunnel, but it is there. Take it from one who knows.  Just white knuckle your way out of there…

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”  – Jeremiah 29:11

This is the second post filled with uplifting advice from women across the internet. These two posts (the first of which can be found here) are dedicated to my 16 year old niece Kelsi and are indeed relevant to any teenage girl navigating her way through life. (I must say, however, that I find great inspiration in these words myself and I am almost 40.)

Enjoy…

“The hardest lesson I had to learn as a young woman was to be true to myself. Too many times I let a boyfriend or a co-worker, or a so-called friend tell me what to think about a specific topic or situation and I didn’t want to rock the boat and so I would agree. Too many times I was a follower and not a leader. Too many times I didn’t listen to the truth I held inside me and respect myself enough to live it.” - Sunday

“Dwell in possibility” -  Emily Dickinson …  I love that three words holds so much meaning–stop and really think–and think hard–about what you can do, what the future holds, and what your place in that future is.

And I cannot help but share one of the very first things I ever memorized, aside from the Hail Mary and Our Father, of course. . .
May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back,
May the rain fall soft upon your fields,
the sun shine warm upon your face,
And until we meet again, may God hold you in the palm of His hand. – Amy

“More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope…” (Romans 5: 3-4) Know that when you are faced with adversity, you are being refined and perfected for the task which you were purposed. Take all hardship and suffering with the mindset that it is readying you for what great task lies ahead. Know that you will come out of your trials with a brilliance that a life of ease could never produce. You will shine and the world will see the fruits of your perseverance.” - Kadi

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”  (Dr. Suess) – Mary

“Nothing beats a failure but a try.” My mother ingrained this in me at a young age and did not accept me giving up on myself under any circumstance. I had to complete everything I started and I have to say I am a better person because I’ve listened to her advice.” – Renee

“Remember that in any relationship – either with a boy or a female friend – YOU always hold the power. YOU control whether someone is worthy of the pleasure of your company. YOU get to decide whether they are worth your time. You are the gatekeeper. YOU are priceless. - Jessica

“I remember reading a quote once that said, “”Wherever you go, there you are.” For some reason, the notion really hit home with me. I was struck by the fact that the only constant in my life would be ME, so I better become a person that I could be proud of. Life changes, friends change and people come and go. But, you? You are in your life forever, and the most important thing about it.” - Jill

Amazing words from amazing women. Thank you all!

My niece Kelsi. Sweet 16.

Dearest Kelsi,

Sweet 16. I can hardly believe it.

No longer a child. Filled with hopes and dreams, you stand on the verge of becoming a woman.

I see your potential and it warms my heart. You amaze me.

I’ve have the pleasure of knowing some  phenomenal women from all walks of life and have enlisted their help to inspire you along your life journey.

I hope you find their words as uplifting and moving as I did.

Love,

Aunt Jennie

“There will be those that tell you, you can’t do “this” or encourage you to do “that” when your heart isn’t in it. Get to know your own voice before you let others drown it out. Wear hot pink whenever you feel like it, dance when everyone else is still and never let anyone put you in a corner baby!” – Lara

“Fear is a normal part of the process when we put ourselves out there and reach for our dreams. But the key to success lies in the decision to refuse to let those worries turn you into someone you’re not. Never settle for letting others decide who you should be – you’re already fabulous the way you are. Stand up for yourself. Stay authentic, be real and dream big!” – Jenn & Jill

“The best exercise for the heart is reaching down and lifting someone up.” If you want to be a better person yourself, turn outward and help others be better people. The rest will follow. – Lolli

“Be proud of what makes you unique. I used to feel embarrassed about the things that make me different, but now I’ve learned that they’re actually my strengths. Be proud of who you are (you don’t want to be like everyone else!) Always walk into a room standing tall and with grace. If you live your life without comparing yourself to others or judging those around you, your life, loves and passions will flourish.” – Bailey

“Always keep in mind the 5x5x5 rule when worrying about something. When something happens that upsets or stresses you out ask yourself “Will this matter in 5 years? Will it matter in 5 months? Will it matter in 5 days?” This enables you to react accordingly.” - Jessica

“Live life life like there is NO tomorrow all while preparing for next week.” – Elizabeth

“Let nothing and no one define you, but you. We live in a world of judgment, where people want to put labels on us to be something or someone they want us to be, but we are so much more. No one can dictate your path and never let anyone do it. Each past moment, no matter how trying, is simply a lesson to learn from – to be more, to be stronger, and to be true to you and your beliefs. Trust yourself. It’s so simple, but sometimes the hardest thing to do.” – Laura

1- Kill ‘em With Kindness: It’s SO MUCH EASIER to retaliate and say mean things back.  Sometimes I do.  Us girls have a tough time with that.  But I’m telling you- kill them with kindness.  When someone is cruel and mean, be nice.  I know, it’s so hard.  Bend over backwards for them.  Go the extra mile.  Be the bigger person.  That person will soon learn that bullying doesn’t work on you.

2- Ditch the Bad Friends: You know the ones.  The ones that back out minutes before you’re supposed to go to the movies.  The ones who never have anything nice or positive to say.  The ones who after you hang out with them you think, “Why am I friends with them, again?”  Ditch ‘em.  Just do it.  I’m not saying delete them entirely from your life, but don’t carve out any of your precious time for them.  They don’t respect it, and you should use that time on positive people and projects.  If they come around and “get it” then great.  If they don’t, they don’t.  You won’t miss those relationships.

3- You Belong: You’re meant to be here.  You matter.  Whatever you want to do, do it.  Pursue what makes you happy. - Mary Kate

NOTE: Tomorrow will hold more words of wisdom…

Ever have one of those really perfect family days? The kind that contain no drama, no fighting, no agendas of any kind?

This is my family on one of those perfect days. We’re all there – brothers, sisters, husbands, wives, fathers, mothers, children and grandchildren. We. Had. A. Blast.

I am reminded that life is filled with these kind of moments and that when they present themselves, I need to savor them.

“You don’t choose your family. They are God’s gift to you, as you are to them.” – Desmond Tutu

Doesn’t this just make your heart melt? I loved it.

(Enlarge it to full screen. You’ll enjoy it more.)

This Valentine’s Day will be different. We have no plans for chocolate-laden-Hallmark sentiments. No outing to a romantic hideaway.  No fancy evening on the town.  No large gifts or extravagant trinkets.  Just a day spent lovingly focused on our family.  The four of us together celebrating our wonderful family unit.

I can think of no better gift to give to my husband and children on Valentine’s Day than my time and focus. Can  you?

I believe that it is appropriate that Valentine’s Day falls on a Sunday this year, because it is a day devoted to God.  Who better than our Lord to show us the true meaning of LOVE?  Because he IS love.

And speaking of LOVE, one of my favorite Bible verses of all time is this one: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves.” – 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Happy Valentine’s Day!

I am concerned that I am facing the last year of Christmas magic with my children.

At this point, my sons BELIEVE.  They believe with all of their little hearts.

But there are some that are close to them who do not.  These children are constantly filling their heads with doubt.  And, yes, their faith is wavering.  It makes my heart ache for them. Mostly because I remember how I felt when I found out “the truth.”  The same thing happened to me… other kids mouthing off.  I remember the feeling I had when my parents took me aside and explained.

I can honestly say that it took me a year to get over it.  But eventually, I recaptured the wonder of Christmas.

Because I realized what it was truly all about.

So we are savoring every single moment with our boys this holiday.  Every Christmas cookie. Every holiday song. Every Christmas wish list.

And then when the time comes, we will sit them down and teach them about how the wonder of Christmas has nothing to do with presents.  How it has nothing to do with hot cocoa or snowmen or toys.  That it is about something deeper… LOVE and HOPE.

And how THAT will never fade.

“I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all year.” -Charles Dickens

I must admit, I am a bit overwhelmed at the response I got from yesterday’s post. It was my biggest traffic day to date.  My heartfelt thanks to everyone who left a comment here, on Facebook, Twitter and via email.  You truly made my day and definitely reinforced my decision.

Oh, the power of the Internets.  I must have struck a chord somewhere.

Ironically, I later found a handwritten quote while cleaning out my office (don’t even get me started) that pretty much summed it all up: “Do not worry about anything, but pray and ask God for everything you need, always giving thanks.” Phillippians 4:6-7

It’s in the BIBLE Y’all.  Can’t argue with that, can you?