Feminists – don’t even bother to try to get offended. “Shit Girls Say” is hilarious.
I dare you to claim you haven’t found yourself uttering some of the phrases contained in the videos below. I know I am guilty as charged.
The videos (which quickly went viral) feature a man, dressed as a woman, in various life situations uttering those phrases we women are most certainly guilty of speaking aloud. (“I know, right?”) The concept originated on Twitter via an account run by two Toronto comedians Kyle Humphrey and Graydon Sheppard.
I saw this photo on Facebook today and just felt compelled to share. The caption: “How Do you live your life? Are you in the first row or the third?”
Indulge me for a moment and take a long look at the photo to your left.
Clearly no one is partying in the third row.
Which begs to ask… In the grand scheme of life, where would you say you sit? Or better yet, where would you like to sit?
In my opinion, front row riders are:
Passionate
Fun loving
Free spirited
Fearless
As for me, I’d classify myself as a second row rider. I enjoy the ride but really get a kick out of watching the folks in the front casting their cares aside and living their lives with passion (and a wicked sense of humor). As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, I have a tendency to stifle my own spirit of the name of being inappropriate or living up to other’s expectations.
I’m really tired of doing that.
Do you ever find your own self hesitating? Ever wished you would have grabbed an opportunity instead of staying in the safe zone? Ever yearned to throw caution to the wind, let loose and let yourself have fun?
I don’t know about you but I’m thinking it is time to move up to the front row.
Yep, still on vacation! It is vacation week here at Hip As I Wanna Be which means that you get a chance to read some blogs penned by some of my favorite writers on the net. Like Lara from Chicken Nuggets of Wisdom. Love it!
Let’s get something straight here, I’m not your average everyday nut-job. I’m above average, most days. Truth be told, I consider myself practically pragmatic. Unlike my mother some people, I’m not buying into this whole 2012 Doom’s Day paranoia. You won’t find me stuffing my basement/bunker full of toilet paper, dehydrated chimichangas and Tang.
Furthermore, I firmly believe we’ve put an actual man on the actual moon. I’m not sold on the theory that a fraternity of evil gazillionaires are holding secret pow-wows deep in the Northern California forest to plan a new world order in which Speedos are required male beach attire. Nor do I buy into the notion that we are all Alien hybrids (though I do have doubts about a few people who hold public office). That said, after having received this year’s school supplies lists, I suspect something is up with teachers and Kleenex.
I am the mother of four pain in the posterior wonderful children. This year I sent one off to college. Good news about him, no school supplies list. Bad news tuition and textbooks. GULP! Two of the little darlings are in elementary school, the brooding twelve year old is in middle school. Now that you’re armed with superfluous information about my offspring, shall I continue?
I noticed something peculiar this year. On each of the mile long scrolls that comprise their supply list is a demand for a minimum of 3 large boxes of Kleenex. Yes I said three large boxes of Kleenex. Okay I get it, children are germ-ridden-snot-filled-bags-of-ooze requiring the occasional leaflet of dead tree to serve as both barrier and clean up crew. Hello, I’m the mayor of Snottykidville, I empathize. But three large boxes per child? (did I mention the boxes were large and they wanted three of them?) This had me perplexed so I did a little “scientific” sleuthing.
In my five year old daughter’s class there are 22 children. If each child brings three large boxes of Kleenex, with 100 tissues per box that is 6,600 snot wipers per class. If a school year is around 320 days, that works out to roughly 21 tissues per drippy nose, per day. Multiply that by 2,000 kids in a school -ooh ooh hold on… brain pain… ugh… this feels too much like a word problem- well that’s a freakin’ heck of a lot of Kleenex sister! So what are they doing with it?
My first hypothesis was, bra stuffing. Not that I would ever have known anything about that practice. Alas, Mr. Carrilio’s unfortunate “issues” with chest over-foliage and the Victoria’s Secret body-by-silicon “no wonder” bra, pretty much nixed that one. The next thought was that perhaps they were using it to line the walls of the teacher’s lounge rendering it sound proof. I know, were I a teacher, I’d be all about that. After hours of deep and logical thought -assisted by Dr Smirnoff- I’ve come to the conclusion that they are planning a coup. Their opening volley in the war of attrition from the PTA will come in the form of a spit-ball barrage of epic proportions.
So gurd the fruit of your loins people. Whatever you do, if the teachers request industrial sized packs of straws, DO. NOT. under any circumstances comply! The fate of the Fall Frolic and holiday wrapping paper sale lays in the balance. It’s a Kleenex conspiracy I tell ya!
If you are a family with children living anywhere near the Washington DC region you are going to want to seriously look into Gaylord National’s holiday offerings.
Beginning November 18th, Gaylord National will offer a brand new 15,000 square foot ICE! extravaganza featuring DreamWorks’ Merry Madagascar™. The animated holiday TV special is being transformed into a interactive wonderland of colorful ice sculptured entirely out of two million (yes, you read that right) pounds of ice.
But that is just the tip of the iceberg. No pun intended.
Gaylord is taking a page from Disney’s books and offering two-night one-of-a-kind Dreamworks character vacations. Families will not only get the ICE! experience but also the opportunity to rub elbows with Po, Shrek, Alex, King Julien and other Dreamworks characters in a variety of unique experiences ranging from character breakfasts, scavenger hunts, and wake up calls to poolside holiday movies, ice skating and more.
Coupled with the hotel’s already extravagant Christmas on the Potomac activities, which include indoor snowfall, simulated Northern Lights and a 7,000 pound Tree of Light, there can be no doubt that it is shaping up to be a regional experience like no other. (Our family stayed there last Christmas and were, quite literally, blown away. I spent the rest of the holiday season convincing friends and family to visit. It was magical.)
Special package pricing families is currently available. For more information on the Christmassy Dreamworks Experience at Gaylord National, ICE! or Christmas on the Potomac, take a look at Gaylord National’s website or call 301-965-4000.
Working momma. Flibbertigibbet. Family environs upkeep manager. Deadline juggler. Intellectual magpie... Random postings from a life of a working DC Metro mom. Unapologetically myself.
I noticed something peculiar this year. On each of the mile long scrolls that comprise their supply list is a demand for a minimum of 3 large boxes of Kleenex. Yes I said three large boxes of Kleenex. Okay I get it, children are germ-ridden-snot-filled-bags-of-ooze requiring the occasional leaflet of dead tree to serve as both barrier and clean up crew. Hello, I’m the mayor of Snottykidville, I empathize. But three large boxes per child? (did I mention the boxes were large and they wanted three of them?) This had me perplexed so I did a little “scientific” sleuthing.
