Why is it that I am so busy from an overabundance of work/family obligations that I can’t find time to eat yet don’t manage to loose A STINKING OUNCE?

Why is it that I can clean for days to prepare for my in-laws visiting but my mother-in-law can find hours worth of things to clean while she is here?

Why is it that my son claims that he brushes his teeth every morning but that his toothbrush is a permanent, hard, cementy mess that wouldn’t even be fit for scouring toilets?

Why is it that when I actually have quite time to sit down to write a blog post I find that I have nothing to say?

ANYONE?

There is an emerging trend in my household and I am not sure how to feel about it.  Part of me is amused. Part of me is sad. Part of me is frightened to death.

My sons have discovered GIRLS.

A couple of weeks ago I mused about how iCarly had stolen Young Jedi’s heart. At that moment it was funny because he had never had an interest before. In fact, he had repeatedly told me how gross they were.  She wasn’t really a threat.

But the mommy gloves are now off.  Selena Gomez is now in the picture and he is OBSESSED.  Compounded with that is the fact that Tiny Ninja (who is 10) has claimed his long time friend (who shall not be named) is his true love and he is going to marry her.

Both boys are discussing kissing.

And I caught them checking out a naked department store mannequin and giggling obsessively. I’m fairly certain they copped a feel when I wasn’t looking. Oh. My. Lord.

The 10 year old has B.O., the nine year old is kissing pictures of Selena Gomez when he thinks we aren’t looking and both are using the word “hot” to describe females.

WHERE AM I?!!

What happened to those sweet little babies that asked me to marry them and told me I was the prettiest woman in the world?  Where are the little toddlers that curled up in my lap and ran their fingers through my hair?

I’ll tell you where they are – watching Selena Gomez and Miranda Cosgrove shake their thing across the television screen.

So what do I do?  Hang on for dear life or deal with it and let them find their pre-teen groove?

Currently excited about: Momz Share & Seed!

Do you hear that?  It is a quiet calm settled through the households around the great state of Maryland.

Why?

The Maryland School Assessments are being conducted throughout the state this week.  For teachers, I suppose it is five days of stressful exam situations. But for us parents, it is nirvana.

Well, at least a slice of it.

For me, the working mother, it is a rare slice of serenity in a sea of turbulence.  MSA testing, at least in my school, means no homework. Can you feel my relief?  Not only that but  this week I have found MY VERY OWN OFFSPRING lecture ME about how they need to get to bed early and eat a healthy breakfast. Imagine that!  The school must be really drilling that info in them because it is working miracles in this household, let me tell you.

So for one week, my children come home and the entire family is relaxed and carefree.  There are no homework battles. No papers. No deadlines. It is like a mini-vacation.

I am savoring it.

DO YOU WANT TO WIN A SPONSORSHIP TO BLOGHER 2010?

Well, then it is time to speak up and start talking about SEED!

SEED Power (a line of all natural body care) is providing some lucky ladies with the chance to attend BlogHer 21010 in NYC with their fabulous SEEDS OF INSPIRATION contest.  Not only will the winner receive a $250 CASH sponsorship, but they will also be VIP guests at an exclusive, swanky NYC PAR-TAY the Friday night of the convention.  (And let me tell you – from what I hear it will be FAB-U-LOUS!)

HERE IS HOW ENTER THE SEEDS OF INSPIRATION BLOGHER 2010 SPONSORSHIP CONTEST:

Visit the Seed Website and read about the products and the founder’s story.

Write a blog post about how the products, philosophy or owner’s story INSPIRE YOU to nurture your own entrepreneurial spirit, live a more organic lifestyle OR make a more positive environmental impact! The post must include a link to the SEED website within it and a mention and link back to this contest to be considered. Then come back to Hip As I Wanna Be and link up!

A COUPLE OF OTHER RULES, BABY:

All contestants must ALSO complete the following steps for their entry to be considered:

• Visit the SEED website and join their community via email
• Follow @SeedPower on Twitter
• Tweet the following “I’m inspired by @SEEDpower & the SEEDs of Inspiration #blogher10 #sponsorship contest http://bit.ly/b2oQDM #pickmeseed”
• Become a fan of SEED on FaceBook

{And don’t forget to leave a comment letting the contest host (ME!) know you completed these steps}

Submit your entry via Mr. Linky below and then you are done!

BUT THERE IS ONE MORE THING, LADIES... The fact that you can enter to win once a week until the contest closes. Just create a new post, link up again and tweet!  The coolness, never ends does it?  And if you want extra chances to win in a different way, you can enter each week over at Chicken Nuggets of Wisdom (Whrrl contest) and Makeover Momma (Vlog contest) as well.

Each entry must be unique and not simply the submission of the previous week’s entry.

Winners who have followed the submission rules will then have their entries judged by SEED on the following criteria: creativity, originality, interpretation of the theme.

SEED Power Body Care will choose the winner of the contest as well as several other winners who will get invitations to the swank-tastic invite only party being hosted on Saturday August 5th, 2010 by SEED.  BTW – Hip As I Wanna Be, though partially sponsored to BlogHer 2010 by SEED, will have no part in the selection process and is simply hosting this contest.

Contest ends March 31, 2010 at 11:00 p.m. PST. Winners will be announced on the SEED website on or about April 9, 2010.  (But it might be a good idea to follow “me” on Twitter and fan Hip As I Wanna Be on Facebook to make sure you are up to date on the contest 411.)

AND…. because they are a truly fabulous company, Seed is also offering the readers of Hip As I Wanna Be a discount on their products.  To order some fabulous products using your special discount code, click here.

Can you believe it?

My very own blog is all grown up and ONE YEAR OLD today!

So exciting!  This blog is truly a passion of mine.  Can you tell?

When I branched out on my own last year and decided that I would host my own blog instead of solely blogging for others, never did I think that I would end up with so many amazing friends and opportunities.

I have been truly blessed by this amazing blogging community.  Y’all rock.

But not even in my wildest Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated dreams did I imagine that I would have been published by Maryland Life Magazine!

I know, right?

If you live in Maryland, get your hands on the March/April 2010 issue and look for my article “It Takes A Virtual Village: Rise of the Mommy Blogs.” (It also features the wonderful Jessica McFadden from A Parent In Silver Spring.)

But back to topic….what I really need to say is THANK YOU to each and every person who has ever stumbled upon my blog and stopped to read a post that I have written.  I may not know you, but you have profoundly impacted my life!

What is with the Girl Scouts and their cookies?

THEY. ARE. STALKING. ME.

Each and every year right about this time the Girl Scouts descend upon the world and blanket it with their cookieness and charm.

Girls, I love ya, but not when I am on a diet.  And FYI, I am usually on a diet after the annual holiday binge.

No matter where I am these days I find myself completely surrounded by those darn Girl Scouts. Everywhere I look the little ladies are smiling at me with their come hither, you-know-you-want-them smiles.

I wasn’t even safe in the blizzard.  Forty two inches of snow.  The entire state of Maryland in a transportation lockdown, but I’ll be damned if I didn’t have a sweet little scout at my door one day asking if I wanted to buy some cookies.  Not. Even. Kidding.

Well, DUH!?

Of course I bought some.

Before you think me weak, consider the facts:

We were trapped in a blizzard.
She was cute.
She was selling us COOKIES.
She was adorable.
It was the middle of a BLIZZARD.
COOKIES.

In the end, my willpower was no match for the cuteness of the little girl tromping around in the snowstorm peddling cookie nirvana.

And now I am five pounds heavier to prove it.

Now I see cookies everywhere I turn. My pal dropped two more boxes off yesterday. I HAD FORGOTTEN THAT I EVEN ORDERED THEM.

And now I can’t have them because of LENT.  Thin Mints taunt me every day from my cupboard.

I’m not kidding when I say that there are Girl Scouts parked outside of every grocery store and discount mart in my town. They are even peddling their wares outside of CHURCH on Sunday.

Is nowhere safe?

I MIGHT NEED TO GO INTO HIDING.  I’ll be blogging from the safety of an undisclosed location for the next few months.

I’ve always been a working mother.

I’ve just, well, always WORKED. I’ve never had the luxury of staying home full-time.

When the boys were very little I never even entertained the idea of staying home with them.  Financially we couldn’t anyway, but at that time it was more about the fact that my career was my IDENTITY.  I mean, I interviewed celebrities for a living!  Seriously.  My parents joked that I got PAID to go to parties and concerts.  And they were right. My job as bureau chief of Sony Worldwide Networks was essentially to run around the music industry interviewing the Tim McGraws and Shania Twains of the world, talk with them about their latest accomplishments, then head back to the studio and create news stories for radio stations across the country.

Not a bad gig. Was a little challenging on the diet, but overall I wasn’t complaining. You know? (Besides, McGraw was kinda hot and I was diggin’ the free alcohol.)

But the music industry was no place for a young family.  And so my husband and I had to make the first of many tough decisions.

So we moved up North to be closer to the family and times got tougher.  I almost had to begin fresh.  It is a bit hard to translate such an over-the-top job into living-in-the-real-world work (What do you mean, I have no real world experience?  Willie Nelson offered me a joint!  Doesn’t that count for anything?) that pays well.  Especially since I ended up at a non-profit.  Not the most brilliant career move, salary wise, but I had a passion for the work and I was close to the kid’s school.  My boys loved it there though.  (Okay. They were spoiled.  I admit it. They were mini-gangstas and it was their ‘hood.)

When it comes to work, I have moved around a bit since that time, giving up opportunities here, finding my own opportunities there and overall working hard to try to find the perfect balance of family, money and career fulfillment.  Not nearly as easy as it sounds! (Can I get a holla?) Jobs might present themselves but they would be hours away and completely un-doable for our schedule.  (Is that even a word? Un-doable? Did I just make that up?)

It is through these experiences that I have come to realize that it is not about the job or how cool it sounds or the deadlines. (Because in my field, there are always looming deadlines.) It is about how I choose to react to the situations that are presented to me.  As good as the job might be, I have to always take my family into consideration when making a decision.

Not to mention all of those Murphy’s Law “mom moments.”  I can’t tell you how many times I have been perfectly pulled together for a board meeting and suddenly had a kid spill chocolate milk on my white blouse.  Or worse – being hit by a projectile potty accident from a training toddler. (shudder) To this day my little ones still manage to put me back in my place when I am feeling a tad over confident.  I think it is God’s way of making sure that realize that I don’t have any REAL control over my life.  Just in case I happen to have any illusions to the contrary.

It is in those uncontrollable moments, when I have been hit in the leg with projectile urine or I reach into my purse and pull out mysterious green slime, that I laugh at how far I have come.  Yeah, maybe I used to interview celebrities and stay in ritzy hotels, but it is how I deal with the real life “mom moments,” that define me.  And I wouldn’t trade that opportunity for all the back stage passes in the world.