Around May of last year I came up with the idea of doing a 40×40 list. It was designed to be nothing more than a fun exercise before I hit that big birthday milestone.

What I noticed about the list recently were the remarkable similarities shared by the items that I wasn’t able to accomplish prior to my birthday. Those items were mostly personal and health related. In other words, I had consistently put myself LAST on the priority list. And by consistently I mean ALWAYS.

Now, the fact that I tend to run a marathon a year makes most people immediately dismiss my health or weight complaints. I kind of hate that, to be honest.

Let me tell you something, I may crank out a marathon once in awhile but that DOES NOT MEAN that I am the picture of perfect health. In fact, I would argue that marathoning has been my excuse for some time now for lack of healthy habits. Couple that with entrepreneurial stress, and a family to manage and you have the perfect storm.

So finally, after feeling chronically tired for weeks and viewing a series of unflattering holiday photos I was forced to quit denying a couple of obvious facts:

• My clothes no longer fit. At. All.I either have to upgrade to a larger size or wear a full body shaper 24/7. I do not want to do either.
• “Tired and cranky” has become my moniker. I haven’t been “happy and energetic” for two full years. It is starting to take its toll.
• I’m not getting any younger. I need to tackle this problem now before it is too late and gets out of control.

So why am I putting this out there? (Other than the fact that I clearly have the need to overshare and thus embarrass myself?) Because I see so many of my friends in the same situation. So many women with career and household demands who let their own care fall by the wayside.

How can we possibly take care of others if we neglect ourselves? For me it is the fear of being selfish woman that leads me away from important choices. Time for myself = time away from the family. A moment alone is a moment I could be spending on a work project or educating myself on the latest business trends. Money spent = money taken away from another priority.

Seeing a pattern here? It is almost like in my own mind I am not worth spending time, money or resources on.

ISN’T THAT RIDICULOUS? I am my own last priority. How can I possibly be there for my family if I am not even there for myself?

Things are going to change around here.

Tags: Health, i am my own last priority, priorities, taking care of yourself

Warning: If you do not want to hear someone whine or discuss weight loss, fitness or the like you had best jump off my blog right now… Still here? Then proceed at your own risk.

For the past two years I have relished cold weather season. R E L I S H E D.

Because I love snow? NOPE. Because I cherish the holiday season? NOT EVEN CLOSE.

It is because, for the past two years, I have had serious body issues.  I don’t even want to look at a pair of shorts LET ALONE a swimsuit. ((shudder))

I have had to jump through some crazy hoops to keep myself covered up. (Two boys who have a healthy obsession with pool water will do that to you.)

I’m going to be honest with you, when I hit 37 my body just changed.  The word “changed” doesn’t actually represent what I am trying to express. It is more accurate to say that my body BETRAYED ME. Suddenly I gained easier than I lost. Suddenly my clothes no longer fit. Suddenly I could run a marathon but couldn’t loose five silly little pounds. Suddenly I felt old and tired. Not to mention tired and old. I began to yo-yo diet…

I’ve had awhile to ponder the state I have been residing in and I’ve come to the conclusion that I am finally ready to move forward.

You would think that self-loathing would have given me motivation months ago… but you would be wrong.

The more I ponder it, the more I realize that if your mind isn’t into it… you will fail.  You can’t just go through the motions on this one. There is no auto-pilot. No “phoning it in.” You have to be ready. Your mind must be a steel trap.

I’ve been watching my girlfriend Lori transform for quite some time now. Lori has lost over 100 pounds THE GOOD OLE FASHIONED WAY.

She is amazing. She is tenacious. She is DETERMINED.

Her mind is focused.

And I plan to join her.

Because I believe that I have found my focus. FINALLY.

Tags: body changes, Health, Weather, weight loss

Post 2 in the Resolution Report series

This weekly report is my accountability to the world as well as a way to help others stay motivated on their own journey to fitness or ahem, a bikini body. I’ll share what I am learning along the way in the tips, techniques, resources & trends section of the posts.

Before I give you some actionable ideas, let me just report that I have lost four pounds in three weeks. YAY! Now, the critic in me thinks I should have lost at least six but hey, I’ll take it!  I’m trying train my brain to get over weighing my success in POUNDS and instead focus on STRENGTH  and BODY FAT loss. Not as easy as it sounds. (I’m half tempted to chuck my scale to avoid the temptation.)

At this moment, my body fat is at 28.2% and my BMI is 24.5.  My goal is to hit 21-22% body fat. I have a way to go, as you can tell.

My upcoming week focus and action items: Hitting my daily water goal and taking those before pictures

TIPS, TECHNIQUES, RESOURCES & TRENDS:

PULL OUT THE CAMERA: You know, a couple of years ago when my husband and I were really focused and on a roll, we took pictures every week of ourselves in bathing suits so we could see the changes that we were making in our bodies. As mortifying (MORTIFYING!) as those pictures were in the beginning, boy did they motivate us to keep our focus. It was thrilling to see visible changes. I have to admit, I’ve been avoiding the camera since January 1. I know that it is time to take that dreaded “before” picture. Sigh. I encourage you to pull out the camera and document your journey. It will keep you motivated and accountable.

FIND AN ACCOUNTABILITY PARTNER: Finding someone to keep you accountable and in essence act as a “cheerleader” is a priceless resource. In this case, tough love can be a blessing.  My partner is Lori. I just emailed her all of my measurements. Talk about vulnerability! Couple that with the fact that she herself has lost over 100+ pounds (not to mention the fact that she is my running partner) and you can imagine how she will help keep me on the straight and narrow.

HIT THE HEAVY WEIGHTS: Obviously I am a cardio girl. I would rather run than do most any other kind of exercise. But there is no denying how rapidly I see results when I hit the weights. (No wimpy weights either. That is just wasting your time, ladies.) I’ll be reporting more on this in my journey but let me just leave you with this little factoid: for each pound of muscle you have, you burn 50 extra calories per day.

EXPERIMENT: Now, obviously I am not a trainer or dietitian so remember these are my own trial and error recommendations… Protein supplements and shakes are very helpful when  you embark on a fitness and weight loss program. I’m a big fan of Myoplex Light (20 g of protein) and Slim Fast High Protein ( 15 g of protein) shakes. I try to substitute a meal with a shake a couple of times a week. Taste wise, I must admit that I prefer the Slim Fast products. They make me feel like I am “cheating” a bit more. Plus, mmmm… chocolate.  And their snack bars really satisfy when I need a sweet fix.

Tags: Fitness, getting fit, Health, mom blogger, Protein, resolution report, weight loss

Best run to date = pain.  Who knew?

This week was my longest run to date in FOR-EVA.  Katie & I tackled 14 miles, six miles of which was hills. The weather was good, we had endless energy and the conversation was flowing. It was glorious.  (And for the record -  we didn’t walk ANY of the hills.  MIRACULOUS.)

Today though, today I am so sore.  The best way to describe the pain is to liken it to the first time you do a lower body leg workout.  The day after pain you experience.  The I-can’t-walk-why-am-I-doing-this-again (?) pain.

I feel like an old woman today. Ouch.

When I feel like this my mind starts to ask questions.  Questions like “WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS IN THE FIRST PLACE, JENNIFER?
My mind sometimes sounds like my dad.

You wanna know why?  For the kids.  For my kids. For your kids.

Let me explain: One day my friend Tracey encouraged me to take a five mile run with her through the park.  I told her that there was no way in hell I could run five miles WITH HER. (She had previously run a marathon.) But her persistence and encouragement that day paid off.  I ran that five miles and I realized that I was limiting myself.  That I could accomplish great things in life by taking it ONE STEP AT A TIME and by believing in myself.

That day represented SO MUCH MORE than ‘going out for a run.” It represented A PHILOSOPHY. The realization that I really could accomplish the unthinkable. And it shapes my life to this day.

My only wish?  That I had learned it sooner.  I am embarking on this charity run in order to pass that spirit along to MY CHILDREN and TO OTHER CHILDREN. I want them to find their power NOW.

So all of this training and running is for ONE REASON: To raise money for the “Run for Something Better” charity. This charity focuses on changing children’s lives through fitness. R.F.S.B. encourages healthy lifestyles, empowerment and the prevention of childhood obesity. They fund running and fitness education programs in schools to show kids how exercise can help achieve good health,  positive self-esteem and self-worth.

And people, I need to raise $2,500. HOLY CRAP.  I need to raise it in the next two months.

Yes, I am scared.  I’m not sure that I can do it.  I’m nervous.  Very nervous.  What I know is that I can’t do it alone.

Will you help me? Won’t you please consider making a donation to support and empower children? (Totally tax deductible, of course.)

• You can donate at my Active.com page.
• OR via PayPal to jlgerlock@comcast.net
• OR via check (happy to give you the address and information if you need it)
• OR your business could sponsor me. (Further details can be worked out on how this can be mutually beneficial. I’ll blog. I’ll tweet. I’ll wear your logo on a coolio t-shirt. And so will Katie because she is a fantastic pal! Email jlgerlock@comcast.net)

AND/OR

• Support me and my cause and help propel it forward through social media. Facebook, Twitter, on your blog.

Together we can help transform children’s lives and attitudes!  If you’ll support my commitment to Run For Something Better, I’ll do all the training.  TRANSLATION: Pain free for you!

Thank you so very much!

Tags: Health, marathon training, new york city marathon 2010, orange laces, Philanthropy, run for something better charity, training for the NYC Marathon

I used to be moving at manic speed.  No, really.  I was  a whirlwind.  Now, I am “recovering.”  I’ve been in a self-imposed “recovery” for about three weeks now.

Just like every other mother that I know, I have a lot going on in my life.  So many things vying for our time.  So many responsibilities. Torn between them all. Not doing one of them well.

I am here to tell you that I am not longer manic.  I am coming out from under the mania.  I am conquering it.

As I write this it is 7:30am.  My husband has left for work. My kids (miracle of all miracles) are asleep and instead of “getting a jump on the day”  and running throughout the house at top speed, I am sitting on my favorite chair with a nice cup of coffee and listening to the bird’s sing.

Do you know how long it has been since I have taken a moment like this?  I can’t even begin to contemplate that.  Sure there is laundry to fold, a bathroom to clean and oh yeah, a bedroom half-painted and client work to begin but instead, at this moment, I am blogging.  I am blogging because I love it and it makes me happy.

And when I am centered and happy I react so much better.  I prioritize so much better.  I am a better ME.  Which, of course, makes me a better wife, mother, business owner, blogger, friend and neighbor.

You might be saying to yourself, “Duh, Jen.  Every magazine in the world runs stories on this topic’s importance.  Why WOULDN’T  you take time for yourself?”

I guess I just didn’t think it applied to me.  It is the ole’ superwoman cliche.  I guess I always believed that I was above all of those pressures. Like somehow I was different.  That those rules didn’t apply to me.  Stress?  Health concerns? “Emotional breakdowns?” That was something that happened to OTHER WOMEN.

<ahem> NOTSOMUCH.

I’ve been chronically tired. I’ve gained weight. I’ve been moody and I have been disorganized.  Combine them all and you get one hot mess of a woman.

So one day last month I literally said “FORGET IT!” (Actually, it was the spicier version of that phrase, but you get my drift.) And I turned down an future family obligation. Then I passed up an unbelievable opportunity. And then I didn’t post a blog.  And then I sat down and READ A BOOK.  AND I refused to feel guilty about it. So radical, right?

I’ve kept it up.

You know what?  I am breathing again.  I am feeling healthier.  And I am managing life instead of letting life manage me.  Now, I evaluate every opportunity that comes my way.  As exciting as it may sound, I weigh it against my goals.  And if I can’t do it well or it will add too much stress, then I turn it down.

Revolutionary, I tell you!  I’m happier.  My kids are happier and my husband is much happier. And my clients get my undivided attention.

So, I ask you, are you managing or are you manic?  What steps are you taking to simplify your life and gain control of your sanity?  Is it a constant struggle between obligations and opportunities?

A resource: 72 Ideas to Simplify Your life

Tags: Blog, choosing priorities well, Health, managing mommyhood, moving from manic to managing, Parenting, simplifying life with a family